Sam Rawson

Stumbled upon this:

dailybooth.com/mrsamrawson

WTF? I have liverspots which are older than him. In fact, I have a muesli stain on my cardigan which is older than him. In fact, I have a girlfriend with more facial hair than h-... actually, scrap that one; if she reads it they'll have to surgically remove an umbrella from my left nostril.

Anyway, back to Sam. Surely he's not old enough to drive, yet he owns a ZR? When I passed my test I was already losing my hair, and I had a mass of upper lip py00bs - he doesn't even look like he has anything worth shaving. I bet his ballsack looks like Matt Lucas after he's been for a bath.

Regardless, any more annoying posts from him and I'll send Berto the link; he's not heard from Sarah141028643725233 for a while so his balls must be the size of Big Slick in anticipation of some new members to e-molest.

oh noes!1

The Hooded Claw has returned. My plans for world domination had risen to 27% complete, however The Claw's return is a serious set-back with regards to my future plans, resulting in a drop of 9%, down to, erm... 27... minus 9...... carry the 4..... denominator....... erm, well less than 27% anyway.

I'm raging. I had the whole place to myself; ShafTz always seems to be away buying suitcases, nitroglycerin and sawdust, and Jonnazi is about as much use as an arsehole on my elbow. However, just as I was beginning to get into the swing of being the daddy, The Claw decides to crash the party and lay claim to the title of Site Owner. He can fuck the fucking fuck off. The site is mine. All mine. IT'S FUCKING MINE I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stupid Claw can eat my boney sock-covered kneecaps.

Rats

Rockstarmike's rat has had babies. I'm shitting my pants as the paternity test results are as-of-yet inconclusive.